I absolutely cannot believe that its already been 6 months since Michael and I promised to love and support each other for a lifetime. Our first 6 months of marriage have been filled with adventure. In this short timeframe we’ve managed to deal with long commutes, go to Hawaii on the honeymoon of our dreams, move into our first home, get a puppy, and start numerous new family traditions.
We are so lucky, our first 6 months have been a “cakewalk.” Before marriage, Michael and I never fought, except for that one time, but I’m not going to go there. So many people said that would change when we moved in together, and it didn’t. They said it again when we got married, and thus far, still no fighting. PRAISE the Lord! I do not want to be married to someone I’m constantly fighting with.
So on our 1/2 anniversary, I asked Michael to help me come up with some advice, tips, etc to share with all of the other newlyweds out there. Also, look at these beautiful roses he surprised me with! What a guy 😉
What we’ve learned:
- In 6 months we’ve learned that living with your best friend is easy when you’re in love.
- We’ve learned to appreciate all gestures of love (whether its roses, coffee, or packing lunch).
- With our opposite schedules, we’ve learned the importance of making time for each other, no matter what night of the week our date may be.
- Make time for each other: With Michael having a normal work schedule, and me working mostly nights, we have to consciously make time for each other. In our lives this looks like me getting up to see Michael off in the mornings, maybe meeting him for lunch, and him staying up until I get home from work to enjoy a TV show together. It is so important to us to make time to catch up with one another, and to just enjoy the time we have together.
- Share the Chores: Nobody likes to clean, but everyone has the chore they would prefer to do. On the weekends, Michael and I divvy up who is going to vacuum, mop, and dust. We tackle it, and then get to enjoy the rest of the day in a clean house. During the week, small tasks like dishes, trash, and laundry are pretty routine. Michael typically does the dishes, I do most of the laundry, and we both take care of the trash. Nobody gets burned out on cleaning, because we share the responsibility.
- Find small ways to make each other’s lives easier: For us, this is mostly evident in our morning routine. Michael has my coffee ready for me when I come downstairs, and unless I accidentally fall back asleep (like this morning) I typically pack his lunch or at least some snacks to get him through the day. Other things we try to do include getting the mail, and tidying up the kitchen. Michael knows that a messy kitchen stresses me out, so sometimes when I get home from work, he has a glass of wine, and a clean kitchen waiting for me. What a keeper, am I right?
- Respect each other’s feelings: This is something we are still working on. Our friends like to joke around a lot. And sometimes this gets carried away. We are learning to make sure that when we are around others that we don’t begin to treat each other the same way we do our friends, and remember that this is our partner. If our horseplay is starting to offend the other, we need to tone it down. Horseplay to an extent is okay, but we should take it too far.
- Make God a priority: This is my favorite thing to watch blossom in our relationship. Michael and I make sure that we make time for Church on Sundays. If we’re sick, we don’t “skip” we simply watch the live stream to make sure we don’t miss a message. We incorporate prayer before our meals. There is something so vulnerable about holding hands and praying for a meal in public. When we have “big stuff” going on, we also pray together at night before bed. I always tend to get emotional listening to Michael pray over us. He was my answered prayer, and listening to him pray for our friends and family always reminds me just how much he cares about others.
- Justify all wants vs. needs: Budgets are hard. We are trying with every purchase to justify the cost. Right now I am spending more money on clothes than normal, because nothing fits me. BUT I am justifying it by selling my old clothes to help alleviate the costs, and to make sure my closet isn’t too full. We also have decided together that costs for the gym, supplements, and healthier food options are warranted because our health is important to us. (So if anyone wants to tell Michael that this includes those cute Dunkin Donuts running shoes by Saucony, please do so! Your girl wants a pair)
Our first 6 months of marriage have been filled with nothing but love, laughter, and living life to the fullest. All I can say that if the rest of our lives are anything like these last 6 months, I am in for a big treat! Does anyone have any tips for us for these next 6 months?
xoxo, Mrs. Z